As It Comes….I Will Remain … Schanntel

I’ve been in the hole.
Was sure it was a black, endless pit—
or was it a hole of opening?
An opening to a mind
I was too scared to explore.

A hole I was afraid to jump into,
feet first.
One sudden move, and everything could go wrong.

This hole took a toll on me.
Everything around me began to crumble.
I couldn’t take it anymore—
I was at my wits’ end.

The hole twisted me around like a puppet,
dancing toward its end—
the end of me.

A part of me I couldn’t live without,
the part that made me whole.
That hole led me into a darkness
where I could see nothing good.

I was bound to the abyss,
and my only escape felt so far away.

Loneliness consumed me.
Fear crawled down my spine,
and I was crippled by it.

The hole was.
The hole is.
And it was becoming—
strong, wicked,
like death itself.

Death stormed against my soul,
yet it wanted to live.
It wanted to be saved.

It saw light in the darkest places.
It saw what no man should see.
But he saw.
He overcame.

I was just the tunnel he kept running from—
running, never allowing.

Were my words too strong?
Did they pierce like swords through your side?
Or was it because this bosom
could no longer tolerate the pain?

I understood before I truly understood.
I just didn’t know when.

And then—

I reached for the light.

It wasn’t far after all.

It was me.

The hole wasn’t my ending,

it was my becoming.

From the dark, I rose,

whole again—

not who I was,

but who I was meant to be.